A couple of Political Jokes

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Published on: June 30, 2006

I got this one in the email from a friend
—–
The Pope took a couple of days off to visit the mountains of Alaska for
some sight-seeing. He was cruising along the campground in the Pope mobile
when there was a frantic commotion just at the edge of the woods. A
helpless Democrat, wearing sandals, shorts, a “Save the Whales” hat, and a
“To Hell with Bush” T-shirt, was screaming while struggling frantically,
thrashing around trying to free himself from the grasp of a 10 foot
grizzly.

As the Pope watched horrified, a group of Republican loggers came racing
up. One quickly fired a .44 magnum into the bear’s chest… The other two
reached up and pulled the bleeding, semiconscious Democrat from the bear’s
grasp. Then using long clubs, the three loggers finished off the bear and
two of them threw it onto the bed of their truck while the other tenderly
placed the injured Democrat in the back seat.

As they prepared to leave, the Pope summoned them to come over. “I give
you my blessing for your brave actions!” he told them. “I heard there was
a bitter hatred between Republican loggers and Democratic Environmental
activists but now I’ve seen with my own eyes that this is not true”

As the Pope drove off, one of the loggers asked his buddies “Who was that
guy?” “It was the Pope,” another replied. “He’s in direct contact with
heaven and has access to all wisdom.” “Well,” the logger said, “he may
have access to all wisdom but he sure doesn’t know anything about bear
hunting! By the way, is the bait holding up, or do we need to go back to
Massachusetts and snatch another one?”
—–
The following one I got from a friend/co-worker
—–
Donald Rumsfeld is giving the president his daily briefing. He
concludes
by saying: “Yesterday, 3 Brazilian soldiers were killed in an accident”
“OH DEAR GOD NO!!!” George W. Bush exclaims. “That’s terrible!!” His
staff sits stunned at this display of emotion, nervously watching as
the
president sits, head in hands. Finally, the President, devastated,
looks
up and asks………. “How many is a Brazillion??!”

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